Sex, Surrealism, Dali and Me by Clifford Thurlow

Author:Clifford Thurlow [Thurlow, Clifford]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Crónica, Memorias
Publisher: ePubLibre
Published: 1999-12-31T16:00:00+00:00

Lobster In Chocolate Sauce

We sat gazing out to sea as if the bay of Port Lligat were the eye of a microscope and he focused on all the events of the day before. He revelled in gossip and scandal. He wanted to know who was sleeping with whom and how much everyone had in the bank. If it were old money he wanted to know how old, and if it were new, he wanted to know how it was acquired. «I am going to give Mr Douglas a small drawing but nobody else», he said and I could hear the Machiavellian wheels turning in his mind. «He has the sensitivity of a true art buyer».

We watched a cat stretching in the fading sun. «Throw a stone at it and make it go away».

«No, let’s leave it in peace», I replied.

«You are a sweet boy, Carlitos. Yul Brynner has fallen in love with you», he said. «Jean-Claude Drouot is in love with both the Twins and Kirk Douglas is in love with himself. That chin. C’est colossal. He never stopped staring at himself in the mirror. I adored all those stories about his sons».

And it wasn’t true. Of course. «People who talk about their children should have their tongues cut out», he once said.

Dalí was not a good listener but he did listen and at the first opportunity he would plunge in with a related but better, more amazing, more amusing tale. He was a terrible boaster, a master exaggerator. His anecdotes grew from lore to legend.

His first journey to New York had become an enterprise as elaborate as Jason’s voyage on the Argos. He had recounted Ambassador Mateo’s faux pas when he kissed my hand a hundred, perhaps a thousand times, switching the location, magnifying his shock, the diplomat’s embarrassment and my response, even suggesting the wine maker wanted to leave his wife to live with me; even suggesting my desire to consummate the madness. Dalí borrowed quotes and jokes, plagiarized ideas and reinvented everything.

«I am a liar who always tells the truth», he declared without a word of thanks to Jean Cocteau. He bragged about the role he had played in the lives of numerous Hollywood stars and his alchemical talents as a matchmaker. «It was me who married Mia Farrow to Frank Sinatra and I arranged it because they were totally unsuited and the task was impossible».

I had a feeling he was thinking about Samantha Eggar and we both turned at the same moment. His eyes rolled and wriggled. «I knew the instant she walked in she wanted to take her clothes off. I can always tell. She has the most marvellous arse. You only have to look into a woman’s arse to know exactly what she is thinking», he said. It was an unexpected gift, Carlitos. You must bring me more gifts. I love gifts and you never bring enough.’

Each casual comment had been carefully considered and, without knowing how it happened, or when it began, a great deal of my time was consumed in finding novel ways to amuse Dalí.

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